Difference between revisions of "Quotes About Children"

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"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents."
+
"It is your responsibility to raise your children to adulthood. You cannot abandon them. You must stay with them. Only in a very extreme situation, if they are highly self-destructive and unmanageable, would you have to part from them. But this would only be in the latter stages of their development and would only be a real exception to the rule."
<ref name="hr">Healing Relationships (September 9, 2008)</ref>
+
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 4: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/the-freedom-to-move-with-knowledge The Freedom to Move with Knowledge]</ref>
 
 
"If humanity does not change its course of action within the next decade, then you will have fewer options and the future for you and your children will be far more grave and far more dangerous."
 
<ref>A New Way Forward for Humanity (December 31, 2006)</ref>
 
  
==Directives==
+
[[File:Children.jpg|right]]
  
"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights."
+
== Quotes about raising children ==
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 
  
"Teach your children the
+
"Teach your children the power and the presence of [[Knowledge]] within themselves and the great dangers of self-deception and social [[manipulation]]."
power and the presence of Knowledge within themselves and
+
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 14: [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/seeing-knowing-and-taking-action Seeing, Knowing and Taking Action]</ref>
the great dangers of self-deception and social manipulation."
 
<ref>''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 14</ref>
 
  
"You must think now not only for yourself or for your community or for your nation, but for the whole world because that will determine your fate and destiny and the well-being of your children and the children of the world."
+
"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents."
<ref>Entering the Greater Community (May 27, 2011)</ref>
+
<ref name="hr">''Love and Relationships'': [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/healing-relationships-past Healing Relationships]</ref>
  
"You must have a great enough Work Pillar to provide for others, to provide for children, to provide for people in need and to secure yourself so that you will not be overwhelmed in the face of the Great Waves of change that are coming to the world."
+
== Spiritual families and natural families ==
<ref>Building the Four Pillars of Your Life (September 15, 2008)</ref>
 
  
"It is your responsibility to raise your
+
"You may not be intrinsically related to your own offspring. That is one reason why parents and children fight. Intrinsic relationship is established beyond this world." <ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community'', Book 2, Chapter 21: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-6/wisdom-greater-community-book-2/spiritual-family Devotion and Commitment]</ref>
children to adulthood. You cannot abandon them. You must
 
stay with them. Only in a very extreme situation, if they are
 
highly self-destructive and unmanageable, would you have to
 
part from them. But this would only be in the latter stages of
 
their development and would only be a real exception to the
 
rule."
 
<ref>''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 4</ref>
 
  
===Upon embarking along The Way of Knowledge===
+
== Parenting by example ==
  
"The most difficult thing in the early stages is people’s obligation to others,
+
“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in [[Knowledge]] and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and [[condemnation]] of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – [[Knowledge]], [[wisdom]], [[relationship]] and purpose.”
to their friends, their family. The only exception to this obligation is the
 
raising of your children, which you must do until they reach adulthood. But
 
to all others, your relationship is now put into doubt. There are circumstances
 
where you will have to care for an elderly or infirm parent, and that
 
is appropriate. But beyond this, you are building your allegiance to God, and
 
that will challenge your allegiance to others and their hold upon you."
 
<ref name="babtanl">Building a Bridge to a New Life (February 25, 2008)</ref>
 
 
 
"If you are in a relationship and you have children, do not make any sudden moves in your life."
 
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 
 
 
"Do not make any sudden decisions about your primary relationships if you are married with children, for in most cases it will be premature."
 
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 
 
 
"Maintain your duties. Provide for your children."
 
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 
 
 
===Through the Great Waves of change===
 
 
 
"You must have the strength here not only to
 
take care of yourself but to take care of others as well—to take
 
care of the elderly, to take care of children."
 
<ref name="gwc1">''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 1</ref>
 
 
 
"Preparing for the Great Waves of change requires
 
many things. It is important, if you have a family and are
 
married, that you begin to prepare them as well. Your young
 
children do not need to know what is coming, but your spouse
 
or your partner must become educated and supportive of your
 
efforts."
 
<ref name="gwc7">''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 7</ref>
 
 
 
"Your children
 
should know, at least, that nature has been harmed by human
 
misuse and by human greed. People have used too much of the
 
natural resources, and now there is less to go around."
 
<ref name="gwc7"/>
 
 
 
"Your older children should really become educated about
 
the Great Waves. Let them read. Direct them to resources that
 
can help to educate them. Have meaningful and objective
 
conversations with them."
 
<ref name="gwc7"/>
 
 
 
"You must take whatever actions are necessary to protect your family
 
and your children, with or without your spouse’s participation."
 
<ref name="gwc7"/>
 
 
 
"Many segments of the population,
 
even in wealthy nations, will be extremely vulnerable—the
 
elderly, the infirm, children without parents or children with
 
only one parent. If you are able, you must be in a position to
 
assist them."
 
<ref name="gwc7"/>
 
 
 
"The financial well-being of your family, your
 
family’s health, your relationship with one another—all must be
 
strengthened now. You must band together and work as a unit
 
as much as possible. Your children will respond if they
 
recognize there is great financial pressure now. Their play and
 
their activities should be simple and natural. In the future, they
 
may not have the technological pleasures or resources that they
 
now might enjoy in a wealthy
 
nation. They will have to adapt to
 
this."
 
<ref name="gwc7"/>
 
 
 
==Parental leadership==
 
 
 
“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in Knowledge and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and condemnation of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – Knowledge, wisdom, relationship and purpose.”
 
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—Knowledge, wisdom, discernment and purpose—are best taught through demonstration.  If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world.  That says more than words can convey.”
+
“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—[[Knowledge]], [[wisdom]], discernment and purpose—are best taught through [[demonstration]].  If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world.  That says more than words can convey.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an inner life and to teach this to your children."
+
"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an [[inner life]] and to teach this to your children."
<ref>The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed (April 18, 2008)</ref>
+
<ref>''The Reformation'': [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/the-reformation/the-new-message-for-the-impoverished-and-oppressed The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed]</ref>
  
"It is your relationship with
+
== The gift of children ==
Knowledge now that is so
 
fundamental and that must take
 
precedence over any other
 
relationship that you have. Even
 
your children who will stay with
 
you, even they cannot interfere with your relationship with
 
Knowledge. The more that you build this relationship, the more
 
you will be able to share it with your children and encourage it
 
in them. For you can never be too young to learn about
 
Knowledge—to learn how to recognize your deeper experience
 
and be true to yourself."
 
<ref>''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 6</ref>
 
  
==The gift of children==
+
"Having children is beneficial to many people. Then life is more about providing
 
 
"Having
 
children is beneficial to many people. Then life is more about providing
 
 
for others. There is a certain peace in this, even though it is not easy. Here
 
for others. There is a certain peace in this, even though it is not easy. Here
 
you do not have time to be constantly questioning,'Who am I? How am
 
you do not have time to be constantly questioning,'Who am I? How am
 
I doing today? What is my mental state? What is my physical state?' You
 
I doing today? What is my mental state? What is my physical state?' You
 
have to take care of people."
 
have to take care of people."
<ref>''[[Wisdom from the Greater Community]] Volume One'', Chapter 11</ref>
+
<ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community'', Book 1, Chapter 11: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-6/wisdom-greater-community-book-1/power-and-responsibility Power and Responsibility]</ref>
  
"Those of you who are parents
+
"Those of you who are parents realize the responsibility and the cost, and yet your children give you something you never would have gotten otherwise."
realize the responsibility and the cost, and yet your children give you
+
<ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community'', Book 1, Chapter 7: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-6/wisdom-greater-community-book-1/personal-freedom Freedom]</ref>
something you never would have gotten otherwise."
 
<ref>''[[Wisdom from the Greater Community]] Volume One'', Chapter 7</ref>
 
  
==Honoring the experience of the child==
+
== Honoring the experience of the child ==
  
 
“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.”
 
“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.”
Line 148: Line 47:
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them…For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.”
+
“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them."<ref name="rc"/>
 +
 
 +
"For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
"While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience Knowledge, learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing wisdom around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.”
+
"While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience [[Knowledge]], learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing [[wisdom]] around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.”
<ref name="rc">Raising Children, December 18, 2007</ref>
+
<ref name="rc">Raising Children (December 18, 2007)</ref>
  
 
"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs."
 
"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs."
<ref>The Age of Women (November 14, 2007)</ref>
+
<ref name="aow"/>
  
 
"Humanity must grow up. Its citizens must become aware and alerted, prepared and strengthened. Allow children to be children, but as an adult, you must gain this greater perspective and assume greater responsibilities."
 
"Humanity must grow up. Its citizens must become aware and alerted, prepared and strengthened. Allow children to be children, but as an adult, you must gain this greater perspective and assume greater responsibilities."
<ref>Destiny (April 12, 2011)</ref>
+
<ref>''The Time of Revelation'': [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/destiny Destiny]</ref>
 +
 
 +
== Quotes about sharing wisdom with children ==
 +
 
 +
"You can never be too young to learn about
 +
[[Knowledge]]—to learn how to recognize your deeper experience
 +
and be true to yourself."
 +
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/relationships-and-the-great-waves Chapter 6: Relationships and the Great Waves]</ref>
 +
 
 +
"For your children, teach them how to follow and listen to their own deeper experience and give them a demonstration of courage and integrity from yourself, from your own life."<ref>''The New World'', Chapter 13: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-world/being-centered-crashing-world Being Centered in a Crashing World]</ref>
  
==Sharing wisdom with children==
+
"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights."
 +
<ref name="babtanl">''The Journey to a New Life '', Chapter 9: [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-life/building-the-bridge-to-a-new-life Building the Bridge to a New Life]</ref>
  
“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by Knowledge.”
+
“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by [[Knowledge]].”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“This wisdom training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe,  places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.”
+
“This [[wisdom]] training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe,  places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
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<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“While the child is born with Knowledge intact fully, they must learn wisdom. Wisdom must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.”
+
“While the child is born with [[Knowledge]] intact fully, they must learn wisdom. [[Wisdom]] must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“By all means, share with them the wisdom you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or  ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.”
+
“By all means, share with them the [[wisdom]] you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or  ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
Line 181: Line 92:
  
 
"These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times."
 
"These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times."
<ref name="tnmfyp">The New Message for Young People (Aug 18, 2008)</ref>
+
<ref name="tnmfyp">''The Bridge to a New Life'': [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/message-young-people New Message for Young People]</ref>
  
==Gender and Sexuality==
+
== Quotes about gender, sexuality and children ==
  
 
“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.”
 
“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.”
Line 197: Line 108:
 
soldiers and nothing else. And the loss to society is incalculable—the loss of talent, the loss of
 
soldiers and nothing else. And the loss to society is incalculable—the loss of talent, the loss of
 
inspiration, the loss of people’s natural direction."
 
inspiration, the loss of people’s natural direction."
<ref>The Age of Women (November 14, 2007)</ref>
+
<ref name="aow">'' The Reformation'': [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/the-age-of-women The Age of Women]</ref>
  
==Education==
+
== Quotes about children's education ==
  
"It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing discretion and discernment is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their education as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life."
+
"It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing [[discretion]] and [[discernment]] is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their [[education]] as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life."
<ref>''Relationships and the Mental Environment'', Chapter 2, Paying Attention</ref>
+
<ref>''Relationships and the Mental Environment'', Chapter 2: Paying Attention</ref>
  
“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called Knowledge. It is the deeper mind within each person.”
+
“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called [[Knowledge]]. It is the deeper mind within each person.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
"Much of what holds people back in life is their unresolved feelings and judgments regarding their relationships, even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people....
+
"Much of what holds people back in life is their irresolved feelings and judgments regarding their [[relationships]], even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people."<ref name="hr"/>
People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health."
 
<ref>Healing Relationships (September 9, 2008)</ref>
 
  
==The future of the human race==
+
"People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health."
 +
<ref name="hr"/>
 +
 
 +
== The future of the human race ==
  
 
"If your children are to have a world to live in, a safe and healthy world,
 
"If your children are to have a world to live in, a safe and healthy world,
then environment must become the most important thing. If environment
+
then [[environment]] must become the most important thing. If environment
becomes the most important thing or the number one concern, then war
+
becomes the most important thing or the number one concern, then [[war]]
will be ended because war is damaging to the environment. Pollution, poverty,
+
will be ended because war is damaging to the [[environment]]. Pollution, [[poverty]],
 
strife and conflict between cultures and nations is antithetical to maintaining
 
strife and conflict between cultures and nations is antithetical to maintaining
a healthy environment."
+
a healthy [[environment]]."
<ref>''[[Wisdom from the Greater Community]] Volume Two'', Chapter 25</ref>
+
<ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community'', Book 2, Chapter 25: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-6/wisdom-greater-community-book-2/natural-environment Environments]</ref>
  
 
"Not thinking ahead, humanity is going to take everything now, robbing your children of their future, creating a future of unimaginable difficulties."
 
"Not thinking ahead, humanity is going to take everything now, robbing your children of their future, creating a future of unimaginable difficulties."
<ref>Nature and Natural Disasters (September 8, 2008)</ref>
+
<ref>''The New World Prophecy'': [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/nature-and-natural-disasters Nature and Natural Disasters]</ref>
  
 
"You will have to pay for the sins of
 
"You will have to pay for the sins of
 
the past, as your children will have
 
the past, as your children will have
 
to pay for the sins of the present."
 
to pay for the sins of the present."
<ref name="gwc1"/>
+
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 1: [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/the-great-waves-of-change The Great Waves of Change]</ref>
  
 
"At this moment, people are selling their children’s future away. They are creating a nightmarish
 
"At this moment, people are selling their children’s future away. They are creating a nightmarish
 
future for their children by the way that they live, what they consume, what they believe and
 
future for their children by the way that they live, what they consume, what they believe and
 
what they assume to be true, based upon their own habits and personal preference."
 
what they assume to be true, based upon their own habits and personal preference."
<ref name="ps">Planetary Instability (March 14, 2011)</ref>
+
<ref name="ps">''The New World'', Chapter 7: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-world/planetary-instability Facing Planetary Instability] </ref>
  
"The disasters of the future will [potentially] be the great calling for humanity to wake up and to grow up,
+
"The disasters of the future will be the great calling for humanity to wake up and to grow up, to cooperate and to begin to use this world beneficially and sustainably so that you may have a future and so that your children may thrive and bring their gifts into the world."
to cooperate and to begin to use this world beneficially and sustainably so that you may have a
 
future and so that your children may thrive and bring their gifts into the world."
 
 
<ref name="ps"/>
 
<ref name="ps"/>
  
"People are ... being heedless and foolish,
+
"People are living in a world of human politics, human economics, human speculation and human fantasy—being heedless and foolish,
 
squandering the wealth of the world as quickly as possible with nothing saved for the future,
 
squandering the wealth of the world as quickly as possible with nothing saved for the future,
 
with no thought for the future, with no thought for the well-being of children and their children
 
with no thought for the future, with no thought for the well-being of children and their children
 
and the kind of world they will have to face and live in."
 
and the kind of world they will have to face and live in."
<ref>Rebellion, Revolution and War (February 22, 2011)</ref>
+
<ref>[https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/revolution-war Rebellion, Revolution and War] (February 22, 2011)</ref>
  
 
"Human neglect, human irresponsibility, human denial—all these things will guarantee a far more
 
"Human neglect, human irresponsibility, human denial—all these things will guarantee a far more
 
difficult future for you and for your children and for the future generations."
 
difficult future for you and for your children and for the future generations."
<ref>The Burden of the Messenger (April 5, 2011)</ref>
+
<ref>''The Time of Revelation'': [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/the-time-of-revelation/burden-of-the-messenger The Burden of the Messenger] </ref>
  
 
"You are determining your future and the future of your children and of all people at this moment by what you think, by how you live, by what you promote and advocate and by how you identify yourself as a human being within this world."
 
"You are determining your future and the future of your children and of all people at this moment by what you think, by how you live, by what you promote and advocate and by how you identify yourself as a human being within this world."
 
<ref>The New Message on the Environment (December 15, 2006)</ref>
 
<ref>The New Message on the Environment (December 15, 2006)</ref>
 +
 +
== Preparing for children quotes ==
 +
 +
"If you are prepared for having a child, if you have
 +
built a financial foundation, if you have a strong and secure relationship, if you are
 +
emotionally ready, if you have gained the [[maturity]] to be prepared to raise a family,
 +
having a child—though challenging—is a very wonderful thing. But for people
 +
who are not ready, who do not have a financial foundation, who do not have a
 +
stable and secure relationship, who are not mature or emotionally ready, well, it is
 +
almost like a disaster."<ref>Food, Water and Energy (February 19, 2009)</ref>
 +
 +
== The new world our children will inherit ==
 +
 +
"If humanity does not change its course of action within the next decade, then you will have fewer options and the future for you and your children will be far more grave and far more dangerous."
 +
<ref>A New Way Forward for Humanity (December 31, 2006)</ref>
 +
 +
"You are entering a new world—a degraded world, a world of diminishing resources and productivity, a world whose deteriorating condition will have the greatest impact upon the lives of people everywhere and the circumstances they will have to contend with. This is casting a [[The New Message Prophecy|dark future]] for their children. They are stealing from their children. They are robbing their children of a safe and secure future."<ref name="resto">Restoring the World (June 25, 2011)</ref>
 +
 +
"You must think now not only for yourself or for your community or for your nation, but for the whole world because that will determine your [[fate]] and destiny and the well-being of your children and the children of the world."
 +
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/greater-community/entering-the-greater-community Entering the Greater Community (May 27, 2011)]</ref>
  
 
==References==
 
==References==
Line 257: Line 187:
 
==See Also==
 
==See Also==
  
''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 7: "Preparing Your Family"
+
[[The new life]]
 +
 
 +
[[Parenting in the Great Waves of change]]
 +
 
 +
== Further study ==
 +
 
 +
*[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/building-the-four-pillars-of-your-life Building the Four Pillars of Your Life] (September 15, 2008)
 +
 
 +
*''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 7: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/preparing-your-family Preparing Your Family]
 +
 
 
[[category:relationship]]
 
[[category:relationship]]

Latest revision as of 00:52, 21 December 2022

"It is your responsibility to raise your children to adulthood. You cannot abandon them. You must stay with them. Only in a very extreme situation, if they are highly self-destructive and unmanageable, would you have to part from them. But this would only be in the latter stages of their development and would only be a real exception to the rule." [1]

Children.jpg

Quotes about raising children

"Teach your children the power and the presence of Knowledge within themselves and the great dangers of self-deception and social manipulation." [2]

"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents." [3]

Spiritual families and natural families

"You may not be intrinsically related to your own offspring. That is one reason why parents and children fight. Intrinsic relationship is established beyond this world." [4]

Parenting by example

“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in Knowledge and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and condemnation of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – Knowledge, wisdom, relationship and purpose.” [5]

“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—Knowledge, wisdom, discernment and purpose—are best taught through demonstration. If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world. That says more than words can convey.” [5]

"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an inner life and to teach this to your children." [6]

The gift of children

"Having children is beneficial to many people. Then life is more about providing for others. There is a certain peace in this, even though it is not easy. Here you do not have time to be constantly questioning,'Who am I? How am I doing today? What is my mental state? What is my physical state?' You have to take care of people." [7]

"Those of you who are parents realize the responsibility and the cost, and yet your children give you something you never would have gotten otherwise." [8]

Honoring the experience of the child

“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.” [5]

“For the young child, then, what is important is for them to begin to value what they see and feel. It is too soon at a very early age to learn discrimination regarding their own experience. First, they must learn how to pay attention to their own experience and how to value their own experience.” [5]

“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them."[5]

"For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.” [5]

"While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience Knowledge, learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing wisdom around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.” [5]

"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs." [9]

"Humanity must grow up. Its citizens must become aware and alerted, prepared and strengthened. Allow children to be children, but as an adult, you must gain this greater perspective and assume greater responsibilities." [10]

Quotes about sharing wisdom with children

"You can never be too young to learn about Knowledge—to learn how to recognize your deeper experience and be true to yourself." [11]

"For your children, teach them how to follow and listen to their own deeper experience and give them a demonstration of courage and integrity from yourself, from your own life."[12]

"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights." [13]

“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by Knowledge.” [5]

“This wisdom training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe, places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.” [5]

“Share the wisdom from other people—from teachers, from poets, from musicians, from great thinkers. Expose them to wisdom. Don’t tell them what it means or how they should regard it. Let them deal with it themselves when they are able, when they reach an age when they can consider more complex thoughts or deeper insights, when their evaluative skills grow.” [5]

“While the child is born with Knowledge intact fully, they must learn wisdom. Wisdom must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.” [5]

“By all means, share with them the wisdom you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.” [5]

“You want your children to be free thinkers, not simply echoes of the culture. You want children to think for themselves, to make decisions, not simply follow what their friends are telling them or what they think they must believe in order to be socially acceptable. You have to deal with these forces of compromise, and in many cases, they cannot be overcome, but the greatest strength that a child has in thinking for themselves and in reconsidering their ideas and beliefs, the greater advantage they will have in the future to set a true course in their life as they grow.” [5]

"These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times." [14]

Quotes about gender, sexuality and children

“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.” [5]

"Boys and girls are put together way too early. They tend to mimic each other. They compete with each other, and they are urged to assume traditional roles with each other, restraining both the young boys and the young girls from cultivating and recognizing their own natural abilities and inclinations. Everyone is expected to mate and to raise families and to have romance. So children are programmed to have romance when they are five years old through the media and through all the images of the culture. This is true in so many places today. How can people’s individual talent and ability ever be recognized under influences like this? It is like preparing all boys to be soldiers and nothing else. And the loss to society is incalculable—the loss of talent, the loss of inspiration, the loss of people’s natural direction." [9]

Quotes about children's education

"It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing discretion and discernment is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their education as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life." [15]

“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called Knowledge. It is the deeper mind within each person.” [5]

"Much of what holds people back in life is their irresolved feelings and judgments regarding their relationships, even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people."[3]

"People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health." [3]

The future of the human race

"If your children are to have a world to live in, a safe and healthy world, then environment must become the most important thing. If environment becomes the most important thing or the number one concern, then war will be ended because war is damaging to the environment. Pollution, poverty, strife and conflict between cultures and nations is antithetical to maintaining a healthy environment." [16]

"Not thinking ahead, humanity is going to take everything now, robbing your children of their future, creating a future of unimaginable difficulties." [17]

"You will have to pay for the sins of the past, as your children will have to pay for the sins of the present." [18]

"At this moment, people are selling their children’s future away. They are creating a nightmarish future for their children by the way that they live, what they consume, what they believe and what they assume to be true, based upon their own habits and personal preference." [19]

"The disasters of the future will be the great calling for humanity to wake up and to grow up, to cooperate and to begin to use this world beneficially and sustainably so that you may have a future and so that your children may thrive and bring their gifts into the world." [19]

"People are living in a world of human politics, human economics, human speculation and human fantasy—being heedless and foolish, squandering the wealth of the world as quickly as possible with nothing saved for the future, with no thought for the future, with no thought for the well-being of children and their children and the kind of world they will have to face and live in." [20]

"Human neglect, human irresponsibility, human denial—all these things will guarantee a far more difficult future for you and for your children and for the future generations." [21]

"You are determining your future and the future of your children and of all people at this moment by what you think, by how you live, by what you promote and advocate and by how you identify yourself as a human being within this world." [22]

Preparing for children quotes

"If you are prepared for having a child, if you have built a financial foundation, if you have a strong and secure relationship, if you are emotionally ready, if you have gained the maturity to be prepared to raise a family, having a child—though challenging—is a very wonderful thing. But for people who are not ready, who do not have a financial foundation, who do not have a stable and secure relationship, who are not mature or emotionally ready, well, it is almost like a disaster."[23]

The new world our children will inherit

"If humanity does not change its course of action within the next decade, then you will have fewer options and the future for you and your children will be far more grave and far more dangerous." [24]

"You are entering a new world—a degraded world, a world of diminishing resources and productivity, a world whose deteriorating condition will have the greatest impact upon the lives of people everywhere and the circumstances they will have to contend with. This is casting a dark future for their children. They are stealing from their children. They are robbing their children of a safe and secure future."[25]

"You must think now not only for yourself or for your community or for your nation, but for the whole world because that will determine your fate and destiny and the well-being of your children and the children of the world." [26]

References

  1. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 4: The Freedom to Move with Knowledge
  2. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 14: Seeing, Knowing and Taking Action
  3. 3.0 3.1 3.2 Love and Relationships: Healing Relationships
  4. Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 2, Chapter 21: Devotion and Commitment
  5. 5.00 5.01 5.02 5.03 5.04 5.05 5.06 5.07 5.08 5.09 5.10 5.11 5.12 5.13 5.14 Raising Children (December 18, 2007)
  6. The Reformation: The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed
  7. Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 1, Chapter 11: Power and Responsibility
  8. Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 1, Chapter 7: Freedom
  9. 9.0 9.1 The Reformation: The Age of Women
  10. The Time of Revelation: Destiny
  11. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 6: Relationships and the Great Waves
  12. The New World, Chapter 13: Being Centered in a Crashing World
  13. The Journey to a New Life , Chapter 9: Building the Bridge to a New Life
  14. The Bridge to a New Life: New Message for Young People
  15. Relationships and the Mental Environment, Chapter 2: Paying Attention
  16. Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 2, Chapter 25: Environments
  17. The New World Prophecy: Nature and Natural Disasters
  18. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 1: The Great Waves of Change
  19. 19.0 19.1 The New World, Chapter 7: Facing Planetary Instability
  20. Rebellion, Revolution and War (February 22, 2011)
  21. The Time of Revelation: The Burden of the Messenger
  22. The New Message on the Environment (December 15, 2006)
  23. Food, Water and Energy (February 19, 2009)
  24. A New Way Forward for Humanity (December 31, 2006)
  25. Restoring the World (June 25, 2011)
  26. Entering the Greater Community (May 27, 2011)

See Also

The new life

Parenting in the Great Waves of change

Further study