Difference between revisions of "Quotes About Children"

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==Directives==
+
[[File:Children.jpg|left]]
 +
 
 +
"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents."
 +
<ref name="hr">[https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/healing-relationships-past Healing Relationships] (September 9, 2008)</ref>
 +
 
 +
"If humanity does not change its course of action within the next decade, then you will have fewer options and the future for you and your children will be far more grave and far more dangerous."
 +
<ref>A New Way Forward for Humanity (December 31, 2006)</ref>
 +
 
 +
==Quotes about raising children==
 +
 
 +
"For your children, teach them how to follow and listen to their own deeper experience and give them a demonstration of courage and integrity from yourself, from your own life."<ref>[https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-world/being-centered-in-a-crashing-world Being Centered in a Crashing World (November 22, 2015)]</ref>
 +
 
 +
"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights."
 +
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 +
 
 +
"Teach your children the power and the presence of [[Knowledge]] within themselves and the great dangers of self-deception and social [[manipulation]]."
 +
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 14: [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/seeing-knowing-and-taking-action Seeing, Knowing and Taking Action]</ref>
 +
 
 +
"You must think now not only for yourself or for your community or for your nation, but for the whole world because that will determine your [[fate]] and destiny and the well-being of your children and the children of the world."
 +
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/greater-community/entering-the-greater-community Entering the Greater Community (May 27, 2011)]</ref>
 +
 
 +
"You must have a great enough Work Pillar to provide for others, to provide for children, to provide for people in need and to secure yourself so that you will not be overwhelmed in the face of the Great Waves of change that are coming to the world."
 +
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/building-the-four-pillars-of-your-life Building the Four Pillars of Your Life (September 15, 2008)]</ref>
 +
 
 +
"It is your responsibility to raise your children to adulthood. You cannot abandon them. You must stay with them. Only in a very extreme situation, if they are highly self-destructive and unmanageable, would you have to part from them. But this would only be in the latter stages of their development and would only be a real exception to the rule."
 +
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 4: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/the-freedom-to-move-with-knowledge The Freedom to Move with Knowledge]</ref>
 +
 
 +
==Relationships and raising children==
 +
 
 +
"You may not be intrinsically related to your own offspring. That is one reason why parents and children fight. Intrinsic relationship is established beyond this world." <ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume II'', [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-5/wisdom-greater-community-volume-2/devotion-commitment Chapter 21: Devotion and Commitment]</ref>
 +
 
 +
==Bridging to a new life as a parent==
 +
 
 
"The most difficult thing in the early stages is people’s obligation to others,
 
"The most difficult thing in the early stages is people’s obligation to others,
 
to their friends, their family. The only exception to this obligation is the
 
to their friends, their family. The only exception to this obligation is the
Line 9: Line 41:
 
<ref name="babtanl">Building a Bridge to a New Life (February 25, 2008)</ref>
 
<ref name="babtanl">Building a Bridge to a New Life (February 25, 2008)</ref>
  
 +
"If you are in a relationship and you have children, do not make any sudden moves in your life."
 +
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 +
 +
"Do not make any sudden decisions about your primary relationships if you are married with children, for in most cases it will be premature."
 +
<ref name="babtanl"/>
  
"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights."
+
"Maintain your duties. Provide for your children."
 
<ref name="babtanl"/>
 
<ref name="babtanl"/>
  
 +
==Raising children through the Great Waves of change==
  
"Teach your children the
+
"You must have the strength here not only to
power and the presence of Knowledge within themselves and
+
take care of yourself but to take care of others as well—to take
the great dangers of self-deception and social manipulation."
+
care of the elderly, to take care of children."
<ref>''[[The Great Waves of Change]]'', Chapter 14</ref>
+
<ref name="gwc1">''The Great Waves of Change'', [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/the-great-waves-of-change Chapter 1: The Great Waves of Change]</ref>
==Short Quotes==
 
  
"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents."
+
"Preparing for the [[Great Waves of Change|Great Waves of change]] requires
<ref name="hr">Healing Relationships (September 9, 2008)</ref>
+
many things. It is important, if you have a family and are
==Long Quotes==
+
married, that you begin to prepare them as well. Your young
 +
children do not need to know what is coming, but your spouse
 +
or your partner must become educated and supportive of your
 +
efforts."
 +
<ref name="gwc7">''The Great Waves of Change'', [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/preparing-your-family Chapter 7:  Preparing Your Family]</ref>
  
It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing discretion and discernment is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their education as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life.
+
"Your children
Relationships and the Mental Environment, Chapter 2, Paying Attention
+
should know, at least, that nature has been harmed by human
 +
misuse and by human greed. People have used too much of the
 +
natural resources, and now there is less to go around."
 +
<ref name="gwc7"/>
  
"Much of what holds people back in life is their unresolved feelings and judgments regarding their relationships, even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people....
+
"Your older children should really become educated about
People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health."
+
the Great Waves. Let them read. Direct them to resources that
<ref name="hr"/>
+
can help to educate them. Have meaningful and objective
 +
conversations with them."
 +
<ref name="gwc7"/>
  
 +
"You must take whatever actions are necessary to protect your family
 +
and your children, with or without your spouse’s participation."
 +
<ref name="gwc7"/>
  
"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs."
+
"Many segments of the population,
<ref>The Age of Women (November 14, 2007)</ref>
+
even in wealthy nations, will be extremely vulnerable—the
 +
elderly, the infirm, children without parents or children with
 +
only one parent. If you are able, you must be in a position to
 +
assist them."
 +
<ref name="gwc7"/>
  
 +
"The financial well-being of your family, your
 +
family’s health, your relationship with one another—all must be
 +
strengthened now. You must band together and work as a unit
 +
as much as possible. Your children will respond if they
 +
recognize there is great financial pressure now. Their play and
 +
their activities should be simple and natural. In the future, they
 +
may not have the technological pleasures or resources that they
 +
now might enjoy in a wealthy
 +
nation. They will have to adapt to
 +
this."
 +
<ref name="gwc7"/>
  
"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an inner life and to teach this to your children."
+
==Parental leadership quotes==
<ref>The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed (April 18, 2008)</ref>
 
  
 +
“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in [[Knowledge]] and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and [[condemnation]] of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – [[Knowledge]], [[wisdom]], [[relationship]] and purpose.”
 +
<ref name="rc"/>
  
"Knowledge within you will not condemn the world. It is only here to activate a certain kind of change in the world. The more you become like Knowledge within yourself, the more you will benefit from its immense strength and fearlessness and power and effectiveness.
+
“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—[[Knowledge]], [[wisdom]], discernment and purpose—are best taught through [[demonstration]].  If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world. That says more than words can convey.
<ref name="tnmfyp">The New Message for Young People (Aug 18, 2008)</ref>
+
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an [[inner life]] and to teach this to your children."
 +
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/the-new-message-for-the-impoverished-and-oppressed The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed (April 18, 2008)]</ref>
  
These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times."
+
"You can never be too young to learn about
<ref name="tnmfyp"/>
+
[[Knowledge]]—to learn how to recognize your deeper experience
 +
and be true to yourself."
 +
<ref>''The Great Waves of Change'', [http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/relationships-and-the-great-waves Chapter 6: Relationships and the Great Waves]</ref>
  
 +
==The gift of children==
  
"Much of what holds people back in life is their unresolved feelings and judgments regarding their relationships, even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people....
+
"Having children is beneficial to many people. Then life is more about providing
People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health."
+
for others. There is a certain peace in this, even though it is not easy. Here
<ref>Healing Relationships (September 9, 2008)</ref>
+
you do not have time to be constantly questioning,'Who am I? How am
 +
I doing today? What is my mental state? What is my physical state?' You
 +
have to take care of people."
 +
<ref>''[[Wisdom from the Greater Community]] Volume I'', Chapter 11: Power & Responsibility</ref>
  
 +
"Those of you who are parents realize the responsibility and the cost, and yet your children give you something you never would have gotten otherwise."
 +
<ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume I'', Chapter 7: Freedom</ref>
  
While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience Knowledge, learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing wisdom around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.”
+
==Honoring the experience of the child==
<ref name="rc">Raising Children, December 18, 2007</ref>
 
  
 +
“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.”
 +
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called Knowledge. It is the deeper mind within each person.”
+
“For the young child, then, what is important is for them to begin to value what they see and feel. It is too soon at a very early age to learn discrimination regarding their own experience. First, they must learn how to pay attention to their own experience and how to value their own experience.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them."<ref name="rc"/>
  
“While the child is born with Knowledge intact fully, they must learn wisdom. Wisdom must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.”
+
"For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
"While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience [[Knowledge]], learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing [[wisdom]] around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.”
 +
<ref name="rc">Raising Children (December 18, 2007)</ref>
 +
 +
"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs."
 +
<ref name="aow"/>
 +
 +
"Humanity must grow up. Its citizens must become aware and alerted, prepared and strengthened. Allow children to be children, but as an adult, you must gain this greater perspective and assume greater responsibilities."
 +
<ref>Destiny (April 12, 2011)</ref>
 +
 +
==Quotes about sharing wisdom with children==
  
“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in Knowledge and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and condemnation of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – Knowledge, wisdom, relationship and purpose.”
+
“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by [[Knowledge]].”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
“This [[wisdom]] training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe,  places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.”
 +
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.”
+
“Share the wisdom from other people—from teachers, from poets, from musicians, from great thinkers. Expose them to wisdom. Don’t tell them what it means or how they should regard it. Let them deal with it themselves when they are able, when they reach an age when they can consider more complex thoughts or deeper insights, when their evaluative skills grow.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
“While the child is born with [[Knowledge]] intact fully, they must learn wisdom. [[Wisdom]] must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.”
 +
<ref name="rc"/>
  
“For the young child, then, what is important is for them to begin to value what they see and feel. It is too soon at a very early age to learn discrimination regarding their own experience. First, they must learn how to pay attention to their own experience and how to value their own experience.”
+
“By all means, share with them the [[wisdom]] you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or  ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.
 +
<ref name="rc"/>
 +
 
 +
“You want your children to be free thinkers, not simply echoes of the culture. You want children to think for themselves, to make decisions, not simply follow what their friends are telling them or what they think they must believe in order to be socially acceptable. You have to deal with these forces of compromise, and in many cases, they cannot be overcome, but the greatest strength that a child has in thinking for themselves and in reconsidering their ideas and beliefs, the greater advantage they will have in the future to set a true course in their life as they grow.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
"These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times."
 +
<ref name="tnmfyp">[https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/message-young-people The New Message for Young People] (Aug 18, 2008)</ref>
  
“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them…For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.”
+
==Quotes about gender and sexuality==
 +
 
 +
“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
"Boys and girls are put together way too early. They tend to mimic each other. They compete with each other,
 +
and they are urged to assume traditional roles with each other, restraining both the young boys
 +
and the young girls from cultivating and recognizing their own natural abilities and inclinations.
 +
Everyone is expected to mate and to raise families and to have romance. So children are
 +
programmed to have romance when they are five years old through the media and through all
 +
the images of the culture. This is true in so many places today. How can people’s individual
 +
talent and ability ever be recognized under influences like this? It is like preparing all boys to be
 +
soldiers and nothing else. And the loss to society is incalculable—the loss of talent, the loss of
 +
inspiration, the loss of people’s natural direction."
 +
<ref name="aow">[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/the-age-of-women The Age of Women] (November 14, 2007)</ref>
  
“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by Knowledge.”
+
==Quotes about children's education==
 +
 
 +
"It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing [[discretion]] and [[discernment]] is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their [[education]] as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life."
 +
<ref>''Relationships and the Mental Environment'', Chapter 2: Paying Attention</ref>
 +
 
 +
“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called [[Knowledge]]. It is the deeper mind within each person.”
 
<ref name="rc"/>
 
<ref name="rc"/>
  
 +
"Much of what holds people back in life is their irresolved feelings and judgments regarding their [[relationships]], even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people."<ref name="hr"/>
  
“This wisdom training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe, places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.
+
"People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health."
<ref name="rc"/>
+
<ref name="hr"/>
 +
 
 +
==The future of the human race==
  
 +
"If your children are to have a world to live in, a safe and healthy world,
 +
then [[environment]] must become the most important thing. If environment
 +
becomes the most important thing or the number one concern, then [[war]]
 +
will be ended because war is damaging to the [[environment]]. Pollution, [[poverty]],
 +
strife and conflict between cultures and nations is antithetical to maintaining
 +
a healthy [[environment]]."
 +
<ref>''Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume II'', Chapter 25: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-5/wisdom-greater-community-volume-2/natural-environment Environments]</ref>
  
“Share the wisdom from other people—from teachers, from poets, from musicians, from great thinkers. Expose them to wisdom. Don’t tell them what it means or how they should regard it. Let them deal with it themselves when they are able, when they reach an age when they can consider more complex thoughts or deeper insights, when their evaluative skills grow.”
+
"Not thinking ahead, humanity is going to take everything now, robbing your children of their future, creating a future of unimaginable difficulties."
<ref name="rc"/>
+
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/nature-and-natural-disasters Nature and Natural Disasters (September 8, 2008)]</ref>
  
 +
"You will have to pay for the sins of
 +
the past, as your children will have
 +
to pay for the sins of the present."
 +
<ref name="gwc1"/>
  
“By all means, share with them the wisdom you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or  ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.”
+
"At this moment, people are selling their children’s future away. They are creating a nightmarish
<ref name="rc"/>
+
future for their children by the way that they live, what they consume, what they believe and
 +
what they assume to be true, based upon their own habits and personal preference."
 +
<ref name="ps">''The New World'', Chapter 7: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-world/planetary-instability Facing Planetary Instability] </ref>
  
 +
"The disasters of the future will" [potentially] "be the great calling for humanity to wake up and to grow up,
 +
to cooperate and to begin to use this world beneficially and sustainably so that you may have a
 +
future and so that your children may thrive and bring their gifts into the world."
 +
<ref name="ps"/>
  
“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—Knowledge, wisdom, discernment and purpose—are best taught through demonstration.  If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world. That says more than words can convey.”
+
"People are living in a world of human politics, human economics, human speculation and human fantasy—being heedless and foolish,
<ref name="rc"/>
+
squandering the wealth of the world as quickly as possible with nothing saved for the future,
 +
with no thought for the future, with no thought for the well-being of children and their children
 +
and the kind of world they will have to face and live in."
 +
<ref>[https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/other-revelations/revolution-war Rebellion, Revolution and War] (February 22, 2011)</ref>
  
 +
"Human neglect, human irresponsibility, human denial—all these things will guarantee a far more
 +
difficult future for you and for your children and for the future generations."
 +
<ref>[http://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-1/new-messenger/the-burden-of-the-messenger The Burden of the Messenger (April 5, 2011)]</ref>
  
“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.
+
"You are determining your future and the future of your children and of all people at this moment by what you think, by how you live, by what you promote and advocate and by how you identify yourself as a human being within this world."
<ref name="rc"/>
+
<ref>The New Message on the Environment (December 15, 2006)</ref>
  
 +
==Preparing for children quotes==
 +
"If you are prepared for having a child, if you have
 +
built a financial foundation, if you have a strong and secure relationship, if you are
 +
emotionally ready, if you have gained the [[maturity]] to be prepared to raise a family,
 +
having a child—though challenging—is a very wonderful thing. But for people
 +
who are not ready, who do not have a financial foundation, who do not have a
 +
stable and secure relationship, who are not mature or emotionally ready, well, it is
 +
almost like a disaster."<ref>Food, Water and Energy (February 19, 2009)</ref>
  
“You want your children to be free thinkers, not simply echoes of the culture. You want children to think for themselves, to make decisions, not simply follow what their friends are telling them or what they think they must believe in order to be socially acceptable. You have to deal with these forces of compromise, and in many cases, they cannot be overcome, but the greatest strength that a child has in thinking for themselves and in reconsidering their ideas and beliefs, the greater advantage they will have in the future to set a true course in their life as they grow.
+
==The new world==
<ref name="rc"/>
+
"You are entering a new world—a degraded world, a world of diminishing resources and productivity, a world whose deteriorating condition will have the greatest impact upon the lives of people everywhere and the circumstances they will have to contend with. This is casting a [[The New Message Prophecy|dark future]] for their children. They are stealing from their children. They are robbing their children of a safe and secure future."<ref name="resto">Restoring the World (June 25, 2011)</ref>
  
 
==References==
 
==References==
Line 112: Line 259:
  
 
==See Also==
 
==See Also==
 +
 +
''The Great Waves of Change'', Chapter 7: [https://www.newmessage.org/the-message/volume-4/great-waves-change/preparing-your-family Preparing Your Family]
 +
 +
[[Higher Purpose]]
 +
 
[[category:relationship]]
 
[[category:relationship]]

Revision as of 15:42, 10 December 2019

Children.jpg

"Many of the greatest contributors to humanity were born under very unpleasant or impoverished circumstances. Often they were not the children of loving and protective parents." [1]

"If humanity does not change its course of action within the next decade, then you will have fewer options and the future for you and your children will be far more grave and far more dangerous." [2]

Quotes about raising children

"For your children, teach them how to follow and listen to their own deeper experience and give them a demonstration of courage and integrity from yourself, from your own life."[3]

"Tell your children that there is a Greater Power within them that will guide and protect them if they listen. Share with them your insights." [4]

"Teach your children the power and the presence of Knowledge within themselves and the great dangers of self-deception and social manipulation." [5]

"You must think now not only for yourself or for your community or for your nation, but for the whole world because that will determine your fate and destiny and the well-being of your children and the children of the world." [6]

"You must have a great enough Work Pillar to provide for others, to provide for children, to provide for people in need and to secure yourself so that you will not be overwhelmed in the face of the Great Waves of change that are coming to the world." [7]

"It is your responsibility to raise your children to adulthood. You cannot abandon them. You must stay with them. Only in a very extreme situation, if they are highly self-destructive and unmanageable, would you have to part from them. But this would only be in the latter stages of their development and would only be a real exception to the rule." [8]

Relationships and raising children

"You may not be intrinsically related to your own offspring. That is one reason why parents and children fight. Intrinsic relationship is established beyond this world." [9]

Bridging to a new life as a parent

"The most difficult thing in the early stages is people’s obligation to others, to their friends, their family. The only exception to this obligation is the raising of your children, which you must do until they reach adulthood. But to all others, your relationship is now put into doubt. There are circumstances where you will have to care for an elderly or infirm parent, and that is appropriate. But beyond this, you are building your allegiance to God, and that will challenge your allegiance to others and their hold upon you." [4]

"If you are in a relationship and you have children, do not make any sudden moves in your life." [4]

"Do not make any sudden decisions about your primary relationships if you are married with children, for in most cases it will be premature." [4]

"Maintain your duties. Provide for your children." [4]

Raising children through the Great Waves of change

"You must have the strength here not only to take care of yourself but to take care of others as well—to take care of the elderly, to take care of children." [10]

"Preparing for the Great Waves of change requires many things. It is important, if you have a family and are married, that you begin to prepare them as well. Your young children do not need to know what is coming, but your spouse or your partner must become educated and supportive of your efforts." [11]

"Your children should know, at least, that nature has been harmed by human misuse and by human greed. People have used too much of the natural resources, and now there is less to go around." [11]

"Your older children should really become educated about the Great Waves. Let them read. Direct them to resources that can help to educate them. Have meaningful and objective conversations with them." [11]

"You must take whatever actions are necessary to protect your family and your children, with or without your spouse’s participation." [11]

"Many segments of the population, even in wealthy nations, will be extremely vulnerable—the elderly, the infirm, children without parents or children with only one parent. If you are able, you must be in a position to assist them." [11]

"The financial well-being of your family, your family’s health, your relationship with one another—all must be strengthened now. You must band together and work as a unit as much as possible. Your children will respond if they recognize there is great financial pressure now. Their play and their activities should be simple and natural. In the future, they may not have the technological pleasures or resources that they now might enjoy in a wealthy nation. They will have to adapt to this." [11]

Parental leadership quotes

“In the New Message, there is not a great emphasis placed on teaching children because it is the parents that must gain a foundation in Knowledge and must learn to discern their own worldly wisdom to whatever extent it has been established thus far from their own desires, beliefs and preferences. To prepare the parents, then, is really the first step, for they cannot give their children what they themselves have not yet learned. If the parent has not yet learned real discernment, has not yet learned the value of discretion, has not yet learned how to listen within themselves objectively, has not yet learned how to restrain judgment and condemnation of others, well, what can they give their children except their own prejudices, their own expectations and the burden of whatever was placed upon them in their childhood as well? What is important for children is what is important for adults – Knowledge, wisdom, relationship and purpose.” [12]

“Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your child regarding purpose is to be living a real purpose yourself, to be demonstrating a purpose yourself. In fact, all four of these things We have mentioned—Knowledge, wisdom, discernment and purpose—are best taught through demonstration. If a child grows up in an environment where his or her parents are engaged in real purposeful work, well, that is worth more than all the words in the world. That says more than words can convey.” [12]

"After your day of hard labor, you come back and you learn to still your mind and to listen. Here you are not simply asking God for things. You are learning to receive. It is difficult at first because the condition of your mind is so aggravated, is under so much pressure, is so consumed with trying to offset the effects of poverty and oppression that at first it seems almost impossible. But like all accomplishments, it takes time, patience and daily application. Even if you are living in a refugee camp or a slum of a city, you have the opportunity to develop an inner life and to teach this to your children." [13]

"You can never be too young to learn about Knowledge—to learn how to recognize your deeper experience and be true to yourself." [14]

The gift of children

"Having children is beneficial to many people. Then life is more about providing for others. There is a certain peace in this, even though it is not easy. Here you do not have time to be constantly questioning,'Who am I? How am I doing today? What is my mental state? What is my physical state?' You have to take care of people." [15]

"Those of you who are parents realize the responsibility and the cost, and yet your children give you something you never would have gotten otherwise." [16]

Honoring the experience of the child

“You do not need to teach children Knowledge because you cannot teach Knowledge. You can only remind people that Knowledge is alive within them and that there is a way to Knowledge, that there are steps to Knowledge that they can take.” [12]

“For the young child, then, what is important is for them to begin to value what they see and feel. It is too soon at a very early age to learn discrimination regarding their own experience. First, they must learn how to pay attention to their own experience and how to value their own experience.” [12]

“You want a child to begin to listen to their experience. Ask them what they see. Ask them what they feel. Let them express themselves even if what they are seeing and feeling seems absurd or untrue. What is important is that they can learn to listen within themselves. What they hear is not so important yet, not as important as the desire and ability to hear and to listen and to feel what their own experience is telling them."[12]

"For the very young child, have them listen to their experience. ‘What did you feel today in seeing this thing? How did you feel about being around these people? What are you feeling at this moment?’ And just let them express themselves. Let them listen. Let them try to understand what their own experience is and encourage their expression.” [12]

"While it is not necessary that a young person learn about the New Message from God, it is important that they can participate in gaining the skills that the New Message provides: learning to experience Knowledge, learning to discern what is going on objectively, learning to value one’s own experience over the expectations of others, recognizing the hazards and opportunities of the world, developing wisdom around how to participate with people, when to express oneself and not to express oneself, how to listen to others to discern what they are really communicating, how to interpret the forces around them. This all seems very advanced, but really, in essence, it is quite simple if the individual can value their own experience and over time gain skill in interpreting what is happening within them and around them.” [12]

"For parents everywhere, it is important over time, instead of casting expectations and demands on the performance of their children, they should look to see what signs are being given to them from their children about their children’s inclinations and strengths, weaknesses and natural abilities. Sometimes this cannot be discerned until a person reaches young adulthood. But to give a young person the encouragement and to teach them to learn the Way of Knowledge so they can gain access to this great intelligence that God has given them is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give a child beyond providing for their basic material needs." [17]

"Humanity must grow up. Its citizens must become aware and alerted, prepared and strengthened. Allow children to be children, but as an adult, you must gain this greater perspective and assume greater responsibilities." [18]

Quotes about sharing wisdom with children

“Do not think that children are wise. They have no wisdom yet. They will walk off the cliff if you let them. They will put their hands in the fire if you let them. They do not have wisdom yet. Wisdom now is very important. Certainly every parent knows they must teach their children certain basic things to avoid danger. And this is the very, very beginning of wisdom training, which ultimately is how to be in the world, how to be in the world guided by Knowledge.” [12]

“This wisdom training should not be accompanied by very fearful language. You do not want to terrorize children; you simply want them to be able to understand on their own what they are looking at while giving them certain guidelines—places that are safe, places that are unsafe, human engagements that are safe, human engagements that are not safe. This is normal, of course, in nearly all families, but it is not taken very far in most circumstances. You have to stay with this throughout your child’s development.” [12]

“Share the wisdom from other people—from teachers, from poets, from musicians, from great thinkers. Expose them to wisdom. Don’t tell them what it means or how they should regard it. Let them deal with it themselves when they are able, when they reach an age when they can consider more complex thoughts or deeper insights, when their evaluative skills grow.” [12]

“While the child is born with Knowledge intact fully, they must learn wisdom. Wisdom must be learned, and therefore it is very important in beginning to support your child to teach them wisdom at a very fundamental level—what will help them from what will hurt them, what looks good from what really is good, what is advantageous and what is dangerous.” [12]

“By all means, share with them the wisdom you have learned in your life, the things that you did that did not work, the things that you did that were real mistakes, the things you did do that really made a difference, that were very wise and effective. Share your experience here, but do not add a great deal of evaluation. Just say, ‘I did this and this is what happened and it was a mistake.’ Or ‘I did this and this is what happened and it really worked out very well for me.’ And any insights you have that prove to be correct, share these with your children. They want to know. They are interested in these things. But you must start early. You cannot start speaking to your child when they are an adolescent, for they may not be listening to you anymore. They are trying to listen to other people. They are already differentiating themselves from you.” [12]

“You want your children to be free thinkers, not simply echoes of the culture. You want children to think for themselves, to make decisions, not simply follow what their friends are telling them or what they think they must believe in order to be socially acceptable. You have to deal with these forces of compromise, and in many cases, they cannot be overcome, but the greatest strength that a child has in thinking for themselves and in reconsidering their ideas and beliefs, the greater advantage they will have in the future to set a true course in their life as they grow.” [12]

"These are all recommendations for young people, but they apply to people of all ages. These are things you should teach your children. This helps them to build the foundation for becoming strong, balanced and powerful in their lives. This message is for young people, but again, its wisdom is for people of all ages. For learning the wisdom of the world is necessary and can be initiated at any age, and gaining contact with Knowledge and taking the steps to Knowledge within yourself is needed by all people at all times." [19]

Quotes about gender and sexuality

“Sexuality prematurely is damaging. It is preemptive. It shifts a person’s focus before they have gained a sense of themselves and their direction in life. And it is true that young boys and girls who had not had a lot of social exposure in this way later went on to become real contributors and successful in their endeavors in life.” [12]

"Boys and girls are put together way too early. They tend to mimic each other. They compete with each other, and they are urged to assume traditional roles with each other, restraining both the young boys and the young girls from cultivating and recognizing their own natural abilities and inclinations. Everyone is expected to mate and to raise families and to have romance. So children are programmed to have romance when they are five years old through the media and through all the images of the culture. This is true in so many places today. How can people’s individual talent and ability ever be recognized under influences like this? It is like preparing all boys to be soldiers and nothing else. And the loss to society is incalculable—the loss of talent, the loss of inspiration, the loss of people’s natural direction." [17]

Quotes about children's education

"It is incredible that people have not been encouraged as children to develop this looking and listening ability. This is a critical part of your child’s development. Developing discretion and discernment is so important, and yet it is not part of children’s curriculum. They are being prepared to have overworked minds like their parents, to be constantly exhausted by having the mind try to consider so many things and do so many things and plan so many things. Children are naturally observant, but this is schooled right out of them. Children are naturally inquisitive, but this somehow becomes lost in their education as they are demanded to think and to recite and to believe and to analyze. It is important to learn these things to a certain point, but not to dominate your mind and life." [20]

“Religious education at an early age can be very damaging to a young person, for it is necessary, ultimately, that a people, instead of praising God or believing in the dictates or the principles of a particular religion, value and follow what God has placed within them. In the New Message, this is called Knowledge. It is the deeper mind within each person.” [12]

"Much of what holds people back in life is their irresolved feelings and judgments regarding their relationships, even relationships in the distant past. These feelings and judgments act as a kind of dam, holding people’s feelings back, arresting them in place, influencing their perception of other people and disabling them from being able to be emotionally open and accessible to their children and to other people."[1]

"People carry this restraint into their parenting of their own children—keeping them distant from their children, disabling them from empathizing with their children. And they often end up acting like their own parents, reflecting their experience of parenting in their own childhood, carrying this forward now inappropriately with their own children, often subjecting their children to anger and harshness and emotional distance. It is a fundamental problem in human relationships, and it is not a problem that is unknown to people. It has become the focus for much therapy and mental health." [1]

The future of the human race

"If your children are to have a world to live in, a safe and healthy world, then environment must become the most important thing. If environment becomes the most important thing or the number one concern, then war will be ended because war is damaging to the environment. Pollution, poverty, strife and conflict between cultures and nations is antithetical to maintaining a healthy environment." [21]

"Not thinking ahead, humanity is going to take everything now, robbing your children of their future, creating a future of unimaginable difficulties." [22]

"You will have to pay for the sins of the past, as your children will have to pay for the sins of the present." [10]

"At this moment, people are selling their children’s future away. They are creating a nightmarish future for their children by the way that they live, what they consume, what they believe and what they assume to be true, based upon their own habits and personal preference." [23]

"The disasters of the future will" [potentially] "be the great calling for humanity to wake up and to grow up, to cooperate and to begin to use this world beneficially and sustainably so that you may have a future and so that your children may thrive and bring their gifts into the world." [23]

"People are living in a world of human politics, human economics, human speculation and human fantasy—being heedless and foolish, squandering the wealth of the world as quickly as possible with nothing saved for the future, with no thought for the future, with no thought for the well-being of children and their children and the kind of world they will have to face and live in." [24]

"Human neglect, human irresponsibility, human denial—all these things will guarantee a far more difficult future for you and for your children and for the future generations." [25]

"You are determining your future and the future of your children and of all people at this moment by what you think, by how you live, by what you promote and advocate and by how you identify yourself as a human being within this world." [26]

Preparing for children quotes

"If you are prepared for having a child, if you have built a financial foundation, if you have a strong and secure relationship, if you are emotionally ready, if you have gained the maturity to be prepared to raise a family, having a child—though challenging—is a very wonderful thing. But for people who are not ready, who do not have a financial foundation, who do not have a stable and secure relationship, who are not mature or emotionally ready, well, it is almost like a disaster."[27]

The new world

"You are entering a new world—a degraded world, a world of diminishing resources and productivity, a world whose deteriorating condition will have the greatest impact upon the lives of people everywhere and the circumstances they will have to contend with. This is casting a dark future for their children. They are stealing from their children. They are robbing their children of a safe and secure future."[28]

References

  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 Healing Relationships (September 9, 2008)
  2. A New Way Forward for Humanity (December 31, 2006)
  3. Being Centered in a Crashing World (November 22, 2015)
  4. 4.0 4.1 4.2 4.3 4.4 Building a Bridge to a New Life (February 25, 2008)
  5. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 14: Seeing, Knowing and Taking Action
  6. Entering the Greater Community (May 27, 2011)
  7. Building the Four Pillars of Your Life (September 15, 2008)
  8. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 4: The Freedom to Move with Knowledge
  9. Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume II, Chapter 21: Devotion and Commitment
  10. 10.0 10.1 The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 1: The Great Waves of Change
  11. 11.0 11.1 11.2 11.3 11.4 11.5 The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 7: Preparing Your Family
  12. 12.00 12.01 12.02 12.03 12.04 12.05 12.06 12.07 12.08 12.09 12.10 12.11 12.12 12.13 12.14 Raising Children (December 18, 2007)
  13. The New Message for the Impoverished and Oppressed (April 18, 2008)
  14. The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 6: Relationships and the Great Waves
  15. Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume I, Chapter 11: Power & Responsibility
  16. Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume I, Chapter 7: Freedom
  17. 17.0 17.1 The Age of Women (November 14, 2007)
  18. Destiny (April 12, 2011)
  19. The New Message for Young People (Aug 18, 2008)
  20. Relationships and the Mental Environment, Chapter 2: Paying Attention
  21. Wisdom from the Greater Community Volume II, Chapter 25: Environments
  22. Nature and Natural Disasters (September 8, 2008)
  23. 23.0 23.1 The New World, Chapter 7: Facing Planetary Instability
  24. Rebellion, Revolution and War (February 22, 2011)
  25. The Burden of the Messenger (April 5, 2011)
  26. The New Message on the Environment (December 15, 2006)
  27. Food, Water and Energy (February 19, 2009)
  28. Restoring the World (June 25, 2011)

See Also

The Great Waves of Change, Chapter 7: Preparing Your Family

Higher Purpose