Starting relationships

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“You must become the person you are meant to be before you can be in a relationship successfully, a deep harmonious relationship, a greater partnership. You bring to that what you have discovered within yourself.” [1]

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"Many of the relationships that people initiate out of desire, passion or need are premature because it is important to get your bearings in life before you engage yourself or commit yourself to others." [2]

"Here it is important to realize that you cannot change or improve another person. You cannot take someone who appears charming and talented, but who cannot seem to function very well, and turn them into a functioning person. Young women make this mistake all the time, particularly, thinking they are going to rehabilitate the young man. 'Oh, with her guidance, this young man will become productive and responsible and effective.' Do not make this mistake. It is an immense waste of your time. You cannot change or improve another person. That is what they must do for themselves." [3]

"When assessing a potential relationship, learn how the other person has dealt with problems: awareness, response, resolution. Never think you can resolve the other person’s problems or try to rescue them. Listen and learn. Wait for Knowledge. Never jump into a relationship no matter what the attraction."[4]

References

  1. Love and Relationships (April 21, 2011)
  2. Living The Way of Knowledge, Chapter 3: The Pillar of Relationships
  3. The New Message for Young People (Aug 18, 2008)
  4. Marshall Vian Summers, Campfire Chat of 4/13/24

See also

Attraction

Outset

Short Quotes About Relationships

Ending relationships

Further Study

  • Wisdom from the Greater Community, Book 2, Chapter 6: Discernment
  • "The Get-to-Know-Me Process" developed by Patricia Summers, Campfire Chat of the Free School of the New Message, March 18, 2023 (at 10:00 AM)